30 April 2012

all who call upon you

"Be gracious to me, O Lord,
   for to you do I cry all the day.
Gladden the soul of your servant,
   for to you, O Lord, do I lift up my soul.
For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving,
   abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon you.
Give ear, O Lord to my prayer;
   listen to my plea for grace."
-Psalm 86:3-6

Gardening is good for prayer. I'm easily distracted by my home. I sit on the couch, determined to keep perfectly still and spend time in prayer, but then I see a dusty windowsill-- I should dust it. I hear the dishwasher stop-- time to unload it. I smell lilacs outside-- which reminds me that I ought to water my indoor plants.

While I dig in the dirt, however, my hands are already occupied and my mind is free to talk to God. I often do, literally, talk; it's more like a conversation that way. And I can sort out my thoughts before Him. I am glad that God doesn't demand that I have neat phrases to say to Him, or that I manufacture a happy attitude before coming into His presence. Usually my prayers are messy. I repeat myself. I ask questions and I complain a lot. If I feel sad or confused, well, that's exactly how my prayers sound.

Yet I know that He wants my heart, no matter how messy it is, and that He uses those times to refine it. What better place to take my grief or complaints than before His merciful throne of grace?

So even though weeds are a sign of the Curse, I'm often glad to see another patch lurking in my flowerbed, because it gives me a few more minutes of undistracted prayer. I would like to grow in self-discipline so that I can pray inside just as well as outside, but for now I am grateful for a garden.

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Recently I've been overwhelmed by the number of people telling me that they are praying for me. For us. To have a baby. Some of these people are family, others are close friends, yet so many more are unexpected: some I barely know, but they found out about our struggle somehow and are lifting us up in prayer.

Many of you ladies (and gentlemen I might add) read this blog. If that's you, please know that your prayers are an incredible encouragement to me and Jared. Thank you so much.

3 comments:

  1. Add my name to that list, Rebekah. I've been praying for you ever since you first "casually" mentioned it. :) Lots of love!

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  2. Yes.....and add my name to the list, too.

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  3. This stranger is also praying for you Rebekah. And please know that as difficult as it's been for me to share my struggles with family and friends, I've found strength and understanding through your courage to be so candid. Truly, thanks for sharing.

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